This Sleep-deprived Woman Trying To Give Away Her “A**HOLE ROOSTER” Has The Internet Folding!
You can buy virtually anything on the internet these days. But just because it’s available doesn’t always mean it’s worth having.
People use the internet as a way to flog unwanted items more so than it’s used as a magical market place… Especially if things are cheap or free. Who wants a Monopoly game without the board? Or shoes with no soles.
However, once in a blue moon do we see a brave hero who will very honestly and descriptively advertise something that they are most honestly just trying to offload (for free might I add).
Denell McCaul from Michigan is the hero we have all been waiting for!
Last week, McCaul, who keeps chickens and one rooster, posted an ad on Facebook for her “inconsiderate jerk” and “ASSHOLE” rooster. And boy oh boy, she ever so desperately wants to get rid of him. Like, seriously wants him gone… Trust.
FREE to good home. Well, any home really. At this point, I don’t give a shit what kind of home this inconsiderate jerk goes to: ASSHOLE ROOSTER. He’s the perfect rooster if your alarm is broken and you need to be awake at 5:30 a.m. That is his only setting, 5:30. He has no snooze button but will be quiet just long enough for you to fall back to sleep and then he’ll start back up with his obnoxious cock-a-doodle-doing right outside of your windows. It’s like he knows where you sleep and can zone in on that particular window so maybe he has some sort of special x-ray vision where he can see sleeping people behind walls. He is also a perfect rooster if you want to start running… around your yard… while you’re trying to get away from him. He no longer goes after me as he is also an instructor of interpretive dance. Or at least that’s what I imagine it looked like as I went after him flapping my arms, jumping up and down, kicking at him, yelling and screaming, and swinging a mop in his direction. So, if you’re looking for an alarm clock with the only setting being 5:30 a.m., a personal trainer and a dance instructor, I have the perfect rooster that is able to fill all 3 of those positions FOR FREE! But you’re coming out to catch this asshole, I want to see your first interpretive dance lesson.
Now, we all have bad days, and Denell is definitely having one. Needless to say, the post is absolutely hilarious and we’re more than sure that they would miss this rowdy rooster when he’s gone.
We salute you, Denell McCaul, thank you for the laughs and good luck with the poultry.